I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
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