I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize