I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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