On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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