so that wasnt chicken after all
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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