And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
