I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
