Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
