Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
