He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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