whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
