I just made out with a guy for $7.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I need to align my fucking chakras
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize