Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(919): View more from North Carolina

How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?

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(802): View more from Vermont

We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.

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(631): View more from New York

we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(317): View more from Indiana

Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.

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(707): View more from California

please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up

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(248): View more from Michigan

We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad

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(256): View more from Alabama

You can't die you're my only democrat family member

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