Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
