I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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