How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
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no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
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You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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