i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
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