what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
