Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize