The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
