Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
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