Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
