going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
