I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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