I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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