Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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