Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
