you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You took a bar mat shot.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
