Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize