I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize