You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
