some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
