I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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