I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
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