fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
