Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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