i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
