This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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