Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
