I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
