Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
