Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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