Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
