She announced her abortion via fbk
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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