Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
