i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
