I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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