kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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