Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
