The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Quick, to the slutcave!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
