...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize